Not Just Happy
I wasn’t always in the habit of asking myself how I am feeling. Instead, my consistent question was “why aren’t I happy”. Happiness was my only desire. If I didn’t have it, I needed to go get it. I was chasing one feeling and avoiding all others. It felt desperate. I can’t always be happy. […]
I’ll Have What She’s Having
Are you jealous of someone? Do you want what they’ve got? Perfect. Use that emotion productively. Feeling jealous means you have been woken up to something you want. And you have an example of someone who was able to get it. When I feel jealous I can sit in my anger, let it fester, and […]
Rain on Your Wedding Day
I’ve spent time being mad at the rain. It sounds (and is) absurd, but the rain has ruined plans I was very much looking forward to, and I had trouble getting over it. It felt like nothing else would be able to make me happy that day. No other activity would be good enough. The […]
Swimming Upstream
A couple of months ago, I told myself I would go to the pool for exercise once a week. I didn’t want to commit to more, and once a week seemed doable. I’ve been keeping that promise to myself, but this week, following through was a challenge. The internal dialogue was distracting. I found myself […]
Ordinary Days
Today might be a regular day. Nothing will stand out. Nothing will be extraordinary. I used to think that was so boring, constantly chasing a feeling of inspiration. But that chase can feel very depressing. It leads me to scroll through my phone, look in my fridge, and get otherwise distracted. Today, if I start […]
Don’t Worry About It
A friend of mine was telling me that he’s always overworked at his job, the people there aren’t respecting his time, and he’s frustrated with the work they’re giving him. It’s natural to worry about someone you love who’s going through a hard time, and “don’t worry about it” can feel dismissive when there’s reason […]
To Pause or Push Through
I was working on a project this week and suddenly hit a wall. I felt fried, but I wasn’t done. It was the middle of my workday, and I didn’t feel comfortable calling it a day. I still wanted to work on some aspects of the material. What do I do when I’m confronted with […]
Walk Away
This morning, while working on a project, I thought I had saved the file. But instead, all my work, both from this morning and previously, was gone. My heart started to race. The screen filled with what looked like gibberish. In an instant, I was completely lost. I wanted to power through and fix it, […]
The Voices In My Head
All the voices in my head are being heard and listened to. If I keep telling myself that I’m an idiot, I am convincing my mind to operate as if that’s true. Our minds are being trained all the time. If I keep explaining to myself that “there’s no way I can do this” and […]
Face Forward, Glance Back
The start of a new year gives us a valuable reference point to look back on. If we approach last year as an experiment, what information can we find? When looking back: Look briefly: There’s no need to dwell on the past. Like looking in a rear view mirror when we’re driving, we glance at […]
