HALT
While I generally consider myself patient and approach situations with respect and kindness, there are times when I experience irritation and overwhelm. This negatively affects my emotional state, behavior, and decision-making. When I respond from this place, I might mistakenly cause damage to a relationship, my work, or even to myself. That’s where HALT comes […]
Why Me?
I stubbed my toe while getting ready for the day, my bike got a flat on the way to meet my friend, and to top it all off, I found out a time-sensitive email hadn’t left my outbox like I thought it did and I was late to respond to a work-related project. I could […]
How is That Working for You
In my childhood home, being quiet felt safe. When I did express myself, the more agreeable I was, the better the outcome for me. As I grew older, this silence directed my personality and I became shy. I wanted to be picked for a singing part in a school play and didn’t speak up. I […]
Thank You
Have you ever downplayed a compliment because you felt awkward accepting praise? I did, for a long time. Raised to be humble, I’d deflect compliments, listing ways I could have done better. Instead of feeling appreciated, the person giving the compliment might have felt like I was correcting them and that their opinion wasn’t valid […]
Ready, System, GOAL!
I have been a freelance employee most of my adult life. One of the hardest parts of being my own boss is managing my time. As a freelancer, I decide my goals, figure out where to spend time and energy, and consistently work on projects without the promise of a regular paycheck. What works best […]
It’s Not Safe in There
We all need safe spaces where we can express ourselves freely, without fear of judgement. But have you ever considered the most constant voice you hear? It’s your own. Notice this: Would you ever speak to someone in a safe space the way you sometimes talk to yourself? The language we use matters, and it […]
The Struggle is Real
I am willing to bet that every great accomplishment you’ve achieved took a lot of work. Everything you value, that you are proud of, took time and effort. This might make you wonder: Why settle for the easy way out? Instant gratification is like a sugar high, it could provide a rush of pleasure, like […]
They’re not doing it to you… they’re just doing it.
A friend recently asked me for some advice on a situation. After listening to their dilemma, I offered what I thought were helpful suggestions, based on my own experiences. To my surprise, my friend reacted poorly, almost as if I had attacked them. I felt confused and hurt. “Did I say the wrong thing?” “Was […]
Role Playing
When you see a character in a movie struggling with their obligations, having a hard time finding what they need, and losing hope in their ability to feel happy, what do you do? I think we tend to root for them. We hope they turn a corner. We hope they find the strength to persevere. […]
You Are What You Repeat
We make dozens, if not hundreds, even thousands of decisions a day. What will I wear today? Where will I have lunch? Who will I spend time with this weekend? When can I take a vacation? All of these decisions turn into action (or inaction) and create a life; every time I repeat a decision, […]
