Princess Familiar

“Papa, love your princess so she will find loving princes familiar. Papa, cry for your princess so she will find gentle princes familiar.” – Alanis Morissette (Song: Princess Familiar)

These powerful lyrics from Alanis Morissette remind us that our reactions often stem from familiar ground.

Our brains are wired for familiarity. Why do we choose certain drinks, clothes, or even responses? It’s likely because they feel familiar, comfortable. If kindness and hope were our childhood lessons, we’ll seek those out as adults. Conversely, if violence and anger were our norm, they might feel normal.

Without self-awareness, we might gravitate towards what’s familiar, not necessarily what we truly desire. The good news? We can rewrite our “familiarity program.”

Want warmth and comfort? Immerse yourself in activities that bring you joy, like spending time in nature, engaging in a cherished hobby, or listening to uplifting music. Surround yourself with anger and resentment, and guess what you’ll find? More of the same.

Whatever positive traits you desire, make them familiar. The more you engage with them, the more likely they are to become part of your identity.

ACTION: Today, be mindful of familiar behaviors around you. Notice how you respond to them. Are they truly serving you?

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