There are some very simple tasks that scare me frozen. Finding a new doctor, sorting mail, talking to an IRS agent, and the like.
What I used to do was skip them. That wasn’t my intention, of course. In fact, all day I would be about to do it – “just have to answer this quick email first and then take a shower” – and then, “oops, it’s time to head out to my appointment.” “I guess I’ll do it tomorrow.” Every day, I vowed to do it tomorrow. Every day, it would be on my mind with additional, relentless thoughts like “I should be able to do this,” “why am I like this?”, “what’s wrong with me,” and the like. Not fun; and not helpful.
One of the ways that I can deal with these chores (once I can admit I’m really NOT doing them), is to recruit help. I remember calling my younger brother about my procrastination with getting my taxes done. I felt ridiculous crying about how I keep pushing it off when all I need to do are things like organize my bank statements to pass along to an accountant. It was helpful to speak through the shame. By admitting where I am emotionally about this project, I was able to ask for the right help.
In this case, we scheduled an accountability call. My brothers do this often. They are also freelancers. Here’s how it works: to boost productivity and keep each other on track, they get on a call together, take the first 5 minutes to tell each other what they will be working on and what they intend to accomplish by the end of the hour. Then sit quietly on the phone/zoom doing their work.
Scheduling the call means that I am including someone else in my promise to do the work. It helps me stay focused, on track, and committed.
Action: Share your fear with someone; a friend, family member, or a therapist. Talking about your procrastination can help you to understand it better and develop coping mechanisms.
