Use the Right Tool Like a Chef
Sometimes when I cook, I flip the food in the pan with my fingers. Not because it’s the best way—but because I don’t want to dirty a spatula or a pair of tongs. To keep going, I end up reaching for whatever’s nearby—a fork, a spoon, the wrong lid—just so I don’t have to clean […]
The No Blame Challenge
It’s easy to blame. I can blame my parents for not knowing exactly how to handle my thoughts and emotions growing up. I can blame my exes for hurting me, misleading me, or even lying. I can blame society for not being fully equal or making my day-to-day life harder. And frankly, the list could […]
The No Complaints Challenge
It’s easy to fall into the habit of complaining. The coffee isn’t hot enough. Traffic is terrible. The internet is slow. Someone didn’t text back as quickly as I’d like. None of these things are unreasonable to complain about—they’re inconvenient, frustrating, even tiring. And in the moment, voicing that frustration feels justified. But what does […]
The Scar Experiment
In 1997, Harvard researchers ran a study that revealed something surprising about self-perception—what we believe about ourselves changes how we think others see us. Participants were told the study was about how facial scars influence social interactions. Makeup artists applied a realistic-looking scar to each participant’s face, making them believe they had a noticeable disfigurement. […]
The Mind-Set Matters Experiment
In 2007, researchers Alia Crum and Ellen Langer conducted an experiment that changed how we think about exercise. They studied a group of hotel housekeepers—people who spent their workdays vacuuming, scrubbing, lifting, and moving nonstop. But when asked, most of them didn’t see their work as exercise. They believed they weren’t active enough. So, the […]
FEAR – False Evidence Appearing Real
Fear has a way of making things seem way bigger than they actually are. I’ve avoided so many things—not because they were impossible, but because they felt impossible. But looking back, most of the time, what I feared wasn’t reality. It was just False Evidence Appearing Real. One example that sticks with me is when […]
Master Pressure Like a Game
When I’m under pressure, my first instinct isn’t always the best one. I catch myself rushing, overthinking, or reacting too fast—like I’m button-mashing in a game, hoping something works. But that usually just makes things worse. (And no one likes playing with the button-smasher.) Good players don’t just hit buttons at random. They move with […]
How To See Real Progress with Atomic Habits
Progress can be frustrating to measure. You’re putting in the effort, showing up, doing the work—and yet the finish line still feels so far away. It’s easy to feel like you’re stuck, like nothing’s changing. I know I’ve felt that way plenty of times. But in Atomic Habits, James Clear offers a way to reframe […]
Direct Your Mind
Why do I keep learning how my mind works? Why do I keep practicing mindfulness exercises? What is all this effort actually doing? The more I learn about the mind, the more I see it as a tool. And like any tool, it needs to be kept clean, organized, and sharp. Here’s how I think […]
It’s Not Too Late
I’m 49 years old right now, and I’ve had the thought, “It’s too late for me.” What’s interesting is I’ve felt that way at so many points in my life—at 39, 33, 23, 17, and even earlier. Looking back, I can see that it wasn’t about my circumstances or my age. It was a feeling. […]
