What Are These Feelings?

How do I get from admitting I have feelings to knowing what they are and when I feel them? It took me a while to even admit I have a range of emotions. What can I do to identify and deal with them when they arise?

One big tool I use is to write it down. To keep in touch with my feelings, I’ve made it a habit to journal as part of my morning routine. Having a dedicated notebook for my writing gives me opportunities to jot things down throughout the day if I feel like it. Just knowing where my writing utensils are is helpful.

When I get big feelings that might be hard to manage, I reach for my journal. My aim is not to write down exactly what feeling I have, and it’s not to figure out which feeling it is. It’s to free-write with no expectation.

When I write with no goal, I can jot down my thoughts like a narrator, and it often reveals my feelings. For example, if I find that I’m writing things like, “I can’t believe they gave him that award. Who does he even think he is,” I didn’t name the feeling in my writing, but reading it back, there’s a sense of jealousy or envy. If you find yourself writing things like, “Ooh, I love the way she tosses her hair back and checks her nails. I wonder how she’s doing,” you might be feeling enchanted or captivated.

Writing it down is a great way to organize thoughts and learn more about how we’re feeling.

ACTION: Take one minute each day to write in a journal. Don’t worry about labeling your feelings right away. Simply write freely about your thoughts and experiences. Over time, patterns will emerge that help you identify and understand your emotions.

What Are These Feelings?

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