Fighting Loneliness

Life feels really hard sometimes. Right now, more people feel isolated than ever. Experts are even calling loneliness a modern epidemic. We don’t naturally run into each other like we used to. Many of us work remotely, cutting off the casual connections we’d have during the day. Our devices give us information we once had to ask someone for. And the constant pull of balancing work and personal life can feel exhausting.

I’m not immune to this. My own loneliness crept in during the pandemic. I went from having casual interactions to booking digital appointments with people. I used to go out and casually bump into friends, colleagues, even neighbors. Suddenly, I was keeping a distance, and it took a toll on my social skills. At times, I found myself feeling like the shy version of me I thought I’d left behind.

When I felt myself slipping, I knew I needed to act. I’ve been down that dark road before, and I didn’t want to end up there again, thinking I’m alone or that no one cares if I live or die. I started using the tools I’ve learned over the years to keep myself afloat. It wasn’t perfect, but I made the effort to keep social ties alive in whatever ways I could. I did things like set up a standing game night with friends every other Friday. My brothers and I committed to a weekly call. My support group meetings went digital, and I signed up for service positions to keep myself showing up. I also started talking to a therapist once a week.

None of these connections shielded me from every bad feeling, but they kept me from sinking too low. Each planned interaction interrupted my thoughts and got me out of my own head. Even if I wasn’t always in the mood to socialize, having these scheduled moments of connection made me feel less alone.

Loneliness is tough. It’s a draining emotion, and the less energy you have, the harder it is to push back. But please, if you’re struggling, try. I know how hard it is, but it’s worth it. I’m still not as connected as I used to be, but I’m staying as connected as I can, and it’s made a difference. I make sure people expect me. I make plans I feel accountable to, treating it like a job because I know I need to. These steps keep me moving toward connection, companionship, and joy. And they’ve been worth every effort.

ACTION: Think about one connection you can nurture this week. What’s a small, meaningful way to reach out? Maybe a quick text, a call, or just letting them know you’re thinking about them. It doesn’t have to be big—small moments can mean a lot.

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