How I’m Tackling Loneliness in a New City
I’ve been feeling lonely lately. That feeling can easily overwhelm me with discomfort and sadness, but since I’ve been learning to manage my emotions, I try to react with logic. I’ve come to understand that when everything is new, it means I have to try new things to adapt.
Right now, I’m in a new, unfamiliar city with no friends for miles. At 48, I find myself needing new people in my life. So, when I feel lonely, I do things that make me feel “unlonely”—like chatting with people in line at the store, striking up conversations with neighbors, and joining groups where I can meet people with shared interests.
I also keep doing what works: staying in touch with old friends, even when it’s inconvenient; staying connected with virtual meetings and circles that I had access to before I moved; and finding comfort in being alone sometimes.
Next week, I’m stepping even further out of my comfort zone by joining a group of strangers who’ve opened an invitation to anyone who wants to walk around a part of the city. Honestly, I feel both excitement and terror. But that’s okay—I can handle both feelings. If I don’t let them dominate me, I’ll join the group and stay open to whatever happens.
ACTION: The next time you feel lonely, take one small step toward connection. Start a conversation with someone in your day-to-day routine, join a new group, or reach out to an old friend. Allow yourself to feel the discomfort but don’t let it stop you—see where it leads.
