Baby Steps to Adulting

I never liked the idea of talking to myself like a child. It feels like I’m shrinking myself down. But the reality is, it’s so effective! We’re so gentle with children. When they’re scared, we take the time to ask why, figure out what’s behind the fear, and we reassure them. If they’re in HALT (hungry, angry, lonely, tired), we raise our patience and help them through it. We notice they’re struggling and show them how to manage it and build resilience.

So, when I think about talking to myself like a child, it’s not some baby talk or dumbing down. It’s about being kind, about self-soothing, and finding my way. I’m not treating myself like I’m helpless; I’m treating myself like a person who’s figuring it out, who deserves compassion.

It hasn’t been easy. My inner dialogue used to be harsh, angry, and with impossible standards. I’ve had to work on changing that—interrupting my usual negative thoughts and trying out kinder ways to speak to myself. I know I’m going to mess up, but every time I practice, I get better at it. And eventually, this kindness to myself becomes my norm.

ACTION: Take a moment to interrupt your usual inner dialogue today. When you feel the harsh self-talk creeping in, pause and practice responding to yourself as you would to a child—kindly, with patience and understanding. If it feels difficult, try journaling or talking it out with a friend to help shift your mindset toward self-compassion.