Find the Next Right Step
If you are experiencing an emergency, stop reading this and tend to it. If you’re not, then stop telling yourself that you are. When we keep replaying painful moments from our past and imaginary **threats in our future, we are sending signals to our body that we are experiencing trauma. When I replay the pain of a breakup, or worry about a dopey thing I might say in a future conversation—or even rehash that awkward joke that didn’t land—every time I replay these wounds in my mind, my body believes they’re happening in real-time and braces for impact. My muscles tense up and my body prepares for pain, even though nothing is actually happening.
That’s why the present matters—it’s the only place where the truth lives. In our minds, we’re time travelers, constantly revisiting the past or projecting into the future. It’s okay to reflect on the past for lessons learned and to look toward the future to set goals. Understanding our experiences can provide valuable insights that inform our decisions. But when we dwell in those places, we lose touch with what’s real. The past has already happened, and the future is uncertain, but the present is where life is experienced. When I return to this moment, I’m grounded in reality. From here, I can see things as they are, not as I fear them to be. And, I can take the next right step with more clarity.
ACTION: Practice grounding yourself in the present by scanning your body. Pay attention to how your feet feel against the floor or your hands in your lap. Doing this can help break the cycle of spiraling thoughts and bring you back to reality.
